Browsing Category

Women’s rights

PAVE 016: Being the executive director of UN women NL, Combatting violence against women, defending women’s rights and working for the LGTBI community on the Western Balkans with Marije Cornelissen

2018-09-04

Marije Cornelissen is the executive director of UN Women the Netherlands. Previously she was a UN Women’s Representative of the Netherlands in 2016. Next to this she works as a freelance consultant for national and international institutions concerning human rights organizations and she gives courses and workshops on lobbying at Leiden University, Clingendael and the College of Europe.

Marije Cornelissen grew up in a leftwing and feminist family. At a young age she participated in the demonstrations against the presence of weapons of mass destruction in the Netherlands.

Since the 1990s Cornelissen has been active in the GreenLeft party. Between 1996 and 1997 she worked as an assistant to MEP Nel van Dijk on women’s rights. In addition she was active in the Feminist Network of the GreenLeft and she was active in the European Green Party, where she coordinated the dialogue between East and West European Greens.

In 2009 she was a candidate for the European Parliament for the GreenLeft. The party congress put her on number three of the list, which was deemed unelectable. As a candidate for the European Parliament Cornelissen campaigned on social affairs, emancipation and anti-discrimination. She advocated increased solidarity between the member states of the European Union.[1][2] Unexpectedly the GreenLeft won a third seat in the election and Cornelissen was elected.

After the election she became a member of the Committee on Women’s Rights and Gender Equality and Committee on Employment and Social Affairs.

She served as a member of the European Parliament between 14 July 2009 and 1 July 2014.

In today’s episode we discuss: how to use lobby as a instrument for human rights, how Marije became a UN representative, fighting injustice as a passion, what working as a MEP taught her, why it is riddiculus to bring the problem and the solution in women’s court and next to all of this: why she want’s a cricket little church and a statue of a cow painted in orange.

TOPICS DISCUSSED AND ORGANISATIONS/EVENTS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

3:00 How Marije became a very young activist at the age of 6

5:00 How Marije became a UN representetive

7:00 Founding UN women Netherlands

9:00 Emma watson, he for she goodwill ambassador

10:00 The he for she artsweek in the Netherlands

11:50 Women’s rights year and the international day against violence to women

Why Marije want’s a cow or a cricket little church lightning in orange

13:00 Orange the world.nl

17:10 Balancing being a mom, being the executive director of UNwomen NL, a teacher, an freelance consultant and an activist.

18:00 Working for the LGTBI community at the Western Balkans.

20:00 Fighting in injustice as a passion.

21:00 The riddiculusness to bring the problem and solution of in women’s court.

24:00 Touching experiences at work

25:00 How we can support UNwomen

28:00 The discovery that made Marije experience things differently

“If you are a director at a charity people are wonderful, instead of critiszing of everything. I never realised how negatively politicians are viewed. I am still the same but people tend to view politicians very differently then regular people.”

33:00 How you can become involved with the UN

34:00 Quote from Marije Cornelissen

33:00 What Marije dislikes about the womens’rights movement

TWEETABLES and QUOTES:

Sometimes I think that we don’t need men to oppress women since we do a fine job ourselves –

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We need to talk with boys about how their behaviour affects the life of girls – Marije Cornelissen

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How do you make the unduable happen? Get the same message from as many angles as possible to your target

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MORE ABOUT MARIJE CORNELISSEN AND HER WORK:

Websites mentioned:

www.unwomen.nl

www.heforshe.nl

www.orangetheworld.nl

www.safestreets.nl

Donations for UNwomen NL: https://unwomen.nl/jij-kunt-helpen/word-donateur/

Social Media:

Twitter:

@unwomen_nl

@MarijeC

Facebook:

https://www.facebook.com/unwomennederland

MORE ABOUT PAVE:

Website: https://www.aliannelooijenga.com

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/PAVE-professionals-against-violence-podcast-1253878638026611/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/aliannelooijenga/

SPONSORS

If you want to be a guest on the PAVE podcast, a volunteer working for PAVE, are you interested in becoming a PAVE sponsor, do you want to help us in an other way, email me to see how we can work together to end the violence against women and children.

email: alianne@aliannelooijenga.com

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PAVE 012: Domestic abuse training & sexual violence training in every organisation with Lyndsey Dearlove from UK says NO MORE

2018-06-11

Lyndsey Dearlove has spent the past couple of years developing UK SAYS NO MORE – a national initiative to raise awareness of domestic abuse and sexual violence in the UK and Bright Sky – a domestic abuse and sexual violence awareness and prevention app for victims of abuse, professionals and for those who are concerned about a friend, colleague or family member. Prior to this Lyndsey has worked with victims of domestic abuse, sexual violence and violent crime for over 15 years.

She has managed domestic abuse outreach support services, refuges, children and family services, Independent domestic violence services (IDVA) and co-ordinated multi-agency risk assessment conferences (MARAC’s). During her time as the manager of the Hillingdon domestic abuse outreach service, she developed the award winning Butterfly Project which is an adaptable model for survivor led – peer support groups. Lyndsey has extensive experience in creating and delivering training around gender constructs, peer support, young people and abuse, risk assessment and management, domestic abuse and sexual violence.

She has delivered training to the Metropolitan police, Local authorities, not for profit organisations, universities and colleges and most recently the National Football League (NFL), where she created and delivered training around gender, domestic abuse and sexual violence. Lyndsey enjoys bringing people to together; to share experiences, ideas, knowledge and expertise and truly believes that only by working together can we end domestic abuse and sexual violence.

ABOUT HESTIA – Hestia delivers services across London and the surrounding regions, as well as campaign and advocate nationally on the issues that affect the people we work with. Last year they supported over 9,000 men, women and children. This includes victims of modern slavery, women and children who have experienced domestic abuse, young care leavers and older people. From giving someone a home, to helping them to get the right mental health support, they support people at the moment of crisis and enable them to build a life beyond a crisis. Hestia is supported by more than 460 volunteers across London who provide specialist skills such as art therapy, yoga, IT, gardening and cooking, as well as befriending and fundraising. Hestia is proud to be the home of UK SAYS NO MORE, bringing together a diverse coalition of individuals, charities, businesses and public sector organisations to campaign for an end to domestic abuse and sexual violence.

UK SAYS NO MORE is a national campaign launched to raise awareness of domestic violence and sexual assault across the UK. The campaign was launched by London charity Hestia in 2016. UK SAYS NO MORE seeks to unite and strengthen a diverse community of members of the public and organisations nationwide to actively take a stand against domestic violence and sexual assault under one powerful, visual symbol. The campaign provides open-source tools and resources for individuals and organisations to take action and get involved in ending domestic violence and sexual assault. Together we can challenge the myths and misconceptions around these issues, share resources and information, and ultimately work together to make real positive change.

To listen to the PAVE podcast Episode 012 with Lyndsey Dearlove please click here:

About your host:

Alianne Looijenga is an international speaker motivating organizations to effectively help survivors of partner abuse, child abuse and sexual abuse. She is also the founder of aliannelooijenga.com and the Professionals against violence (PAVE) podcast. Alianne is a survivor of sexual abuse (including rape); partner abuse; and is the mother of twins who were abused by their biological father after a judge granted him visitation rights when the children were three years old.

Alianne is dedicated to the empowerment of survivors of abuse and to support organisations working to end the violence against women and children.

TOPICS DISCUSSED AND ORGANISATIONS/EVENTS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

0-19 minutes: About Hestia, UK says no more, Lyndsey Dearlove

20.00 NFL ambassadorprogram where football players teach other boys about what masculinity means in this society, concent in healthy relationships and what their role is to end the violence against women.

“If I am unable to drive someone home in a car why are you able to decide if you are able to have consensual sex or not”

25:00 No more hub

26:00 UK says no more week

30:00 When Lyndsey is old and is looking back at her life, what does she want to have accomplished?

34:00 minuten Victim blaming “Knowledge is nothing untill you share it “.

“We have to have domestic abuse training and sexual violence training in every single organisation”

36:00 listening without judging

37:00 an exercise Lyndsey always does with her students to let them feel the reality survivors face when leaving an abuser.

40:00 Managing UK says no more and working with surviving children

45:00 The importance of education

49:00 How to leave your work at work

50:00 Taking time to reflect

51:00 With all things going on, what is Lyndsey most eager to solve

57:00 Advice inspiration and a succes story

TWEETABLES:

We have to have domestic abuse- and sexual violence training in each organisation – Lyndsey Dearlove

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Can we have another look at the system, cause the system currently doesn’t work – Lyndsey Dearlove

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Knowledge is nothing untill you share it. – PAVE podcast with Lyndsey Dearlove

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If you are unable to drive someone home, how can you decide if you are able to have consensual sex – Lyndsey Dearlove

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MORE ABOUT UK SAYS NO MORE

Our website is: http://uksaysnomore.org/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/UKSAYSNOMORE/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/UKSAYSNOMORE

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/uksaysnomore/?hl=en

MORE ABOUT PAVE

https://www.instagram.com/aliannelooijenga

www.aliannelooijenga.com

SPONSORS

If you want to be a guest on the PAVE podcast, a volunteer working for PAVE, if you are interested in becoming a PAVE sponsor, or want to help us in an other way, email me to see how we can work together to end the violence against women and children.

email: alianne@aliannelooijenga.com

To listen to the PAVE podcast Episode 012 with Lyndsey Dearlove from UK says NO MORE please click here:

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: RSS

PAVE 011: Fighting your own battles first before you can save others and become a superwoman next door with Upasana Chauhan

2018-05-15

Upasana Chauhan is the founder of Superwoman Next Door. She is an UN Representative of Manup Campaign, spread across 23 countries to involve men in the battle of Gender Equality. Upasana send me an impressive list of 14 organisations/projects she is involved with including many from the UN, but it would be a too long (although impressive) list to share on this blogpage. If you want to read it for yourself, click here: http://www.womenshealthsection.com/content/documents/Upasana_Chauhan_Resume.pdf

Upasana’s dream and passion is to encourage and empower every girl next door to be courageous to DARE TO DREAM and be her own superwoman to get those dreams. She is on the drafting committee for the Newyork City for CEDAW bill.

To listen to the PAVE podcast Episode 011 with Upasana Chauhan please click here: PAVE podcast with Upasana Chauhan on Itunes

About your host:

Alianne is dedicated to the empowerment of survivors of abuse and to support organisations working to end the violence against women and children.

TOPICS DISCUSSED AND ORGANISATIONS/EVENTS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

1:24 : Growing up in India

Your soul knows..

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2:50 Paving your own path and paving the path for others

3:15 NGO “I do dare”, ManUp campaign of the UN, Upasana’s career so far.

We can’t stop violence against women unless we involve men in the cause

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7:00 Is there a change within the men of India, about how they view women?

7:30 How men teach other men about women’s rights

8:00 Losing your identity as a woman when you marry in India

10:00 What Upasana discovered when she was looking for an arranged marriage

12:00 Passing values on to your children

14:50 What drives Upasana

Maybe I can inspire them so that one day, they can come out of that trap too

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21:00 When women are objects and have no rights

24:00 How do you re-energize when you fight so hard for other women’s rights?

32:00 Why people believe that they are entitled to judge another human being

33:00 Rediscovering your identity

35:00 Female suicides in India

I can do anything for them, but I can’t go to their homes with them. Because that is a battle that each one has to fight for themselves.

I had to fight the battle myself inside my own home first. Then only I can fight it globally. You have to first fight it for yourself.

The decision to change has to come from within – Alianne Looijenga

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40:00 The importance of financial independence

Take that fear out of your body. Throw the fear out. Fear controls you. You get scared what happens if I do this, or what happens if I do that.

44:00 Upasana’s advice if you want to change other people’s lives

46:00 Why your work should not be about you

48:00 When you respond with kindness and love to people who put you down, you include them into your journey

Why are we not talking about the common woman nailing her own thing? Upasana Chauhan

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51:00 How we can support Upasana by sharing stories about women who live next door to us.

“Alianne is equally Oprah Winfrey as Oprah Winfrey is Alianne.

You are your own superwoman in your own way doing your own amazing thing. So is Oprah. The only difference is that the whole world knows Oprah, and your neighbor knows Alianne. But is Alianne any less than Oprah? No. And that’s why I started SuperWoman Next Door.” – Upasana Chauhan

59:00 Initial ending: yeah kidding, we talked further

1:03:00 Get out of that thing that holds you down

Be your own superwoman. Don’t wait for someone to save you. Nobody will come and save you. You will have to save yourself. There is no prince charming. And even if there is, he can come and join you while you save yourself. But you don’t have to sit and wait around. You have to take control.

1:08:00 Being grateful in difficult times, ending.

TWEETABLES:

Breaking that ceiling, breaking that door, breaking that silence.. that gives me strength – Upasana Chauhan

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Because I know how it feels, I don’t want another having to go through that feeling – Upasana Chauhan

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I had to fight for my own identity, I have it today – Upasana Chauhan

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You cannot call them family if they are the ones that cause you pain – Upasana Chauhan

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I don’t need you, you need me – Upasana Chauhan

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Start with what you have – Upasana Chauhan

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Why are we not talking about the common woman nailing her own thing? – Upasana Chauhan

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MORE ABOUT UPASANA AND SUPERWOMAN NEXT DOOR

https://twitter.com/upasanac?lang=en

https://www.facebook.com/superwomannextdoor/

Superwoman Next Door website

To submit stories to Upasana:

superwomannextdoor@gmail.com

MORE ABOUT PAVE

https://www.instagram.com/aliannelooijenga

Www.aliannelooijenga.com

SPONSORS

email: alianne@aliannelooijenga.com

To listen to the PAVE podcast Episode 011 with Upasana Chauhan please click here: PAVE podcast with Upasana Chauhan on Itunes

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: RSS

How I survived one of my most darkest moments in life (and it was not being raped)

2018-01-22

(I wrote this blog a few years ago for lifesurfer.net)

A few nights ago I remembered one of the darkest and difficult moments I ever faced…

It is not the moment I was raped, nor the loneliness of feeling scared and vulnerable. Not the days I was almost killed. Not the moments that the prosecutor decided not to give punishment to my ex-partner, and not the moment when they didn’t prosecute my uncle of sexual abuse. Not the night I discovered that my ex-partner had the right to let me be put in jail for protecting my children and not giving them to him for visits for as long he didn’t seek hel

No, one of my darkest moments was the moment I was sitting in front of the judge.

At the time, I was thriving as a university student and my children and I hadn’t heard from my ex-partner in years. This I considered as a good thing because of the damage he had done and because the child protection services opinion was that it was best for him to stay away.
A part of my study program consisted of spending five months abroad. To travel with Dutch children you need the permission of either the biological father of the children or a judge.

I made use of a contact person to ask the permission of the biological father of the children to go abroad for five months. Of course, he declined. I suspected he would, although he never asked after the children to see how they were doing although he couldn’t see them.
I suspected that because of me asking, he would feel in charge, he would feel in control. After he declined, I went to court to ask the judge for permission, and in the same courtroom, he cried out that he missed the children, that it was all my fault he didn’t see them, I was a liar, etc.

Before entering the courtroom my lawyer turned to me, completely pale. Oh no, she cried… not this judge. And, when finding out who was to be the spokeswoman of the child protection services, I saw devastation in her eyes. I was calm and thought that with enough reason it would become completely clear that we needed to go to the USA to complete my study program and that a biological father who abused his children, never even once inquired after the children, and the social services who thought it was best for us that he would leave the children and me alone, would make her mind up pretty quickly.

What followed left me dumbfounded. My lawyer started shaking after the judge chewed me and her out and the judge did not let me speak, was downright nasty to me, and then threatened me that if my ex-partner didn’t see my children, they would have to live with him, even though his story wasn’t met with evidence and often he made comments that a judge who was listening would have heard that it was all about controlling ME and had nothing to do with love for the children. I did not know that a judge could and had permission to behave this way.

After a while, I started trembling. I left the courtroom devastated and went into depression for a few months. I felt betrayed and vulnerable and somewhat a victim after being a victim because the government had failed to protect me… again

That year I learned quite a lot. I learned to gain mastery over my feelings. I had seen the lowest point, and one of my biggest fears had come true. I only could go up from there. I decided that whatever happened, nobody could own my thoughts. I was the master of my feelings and I would never give someone the power over my feelings and let me feel miserable again. Yes, they could decide pretty nasty things for me, but how I would react to that, how it would made me feel, and the decisions I would make because of that… those were surely and alone my responsibility. I knew that moments would pass, and the decisions I would make in each and every moment would shape my destiny.

Months later, I returned to the courtroom. I walked in and recognized the judge of whom I was previously so fearful. I looked up to the heaven and said; “of course”, and winked towards the ceiling (I really did!). I knew it was my test to see how I would react to seeing her again. I felt powerful and I believe God gave me strength and this combined with my gained strengths.

The judge still wasn’t very fond of me. But it didn’t matter to me anymore. I smiled, answered her questions, and even gave her a tiny taste of her own medicine and confronted her with something she’d said.

I wasn’t driven by fear because I was driven by the knowledge that regardless of what happened, I would survive and I would make sure that my children and I were safe. I would see the big picture and realize that one moment did not define the millions of other moments I would still live. Never ever would I give the power to control my happiness and my future to anyone else again and certainly not some mystical creature who did not know who I was or what I stood for. I would no longer give power to the decisions of others; instead, I would focus on what I can control, which is…. myself.

PAVE 005: Empowering women, UNwomen, Ananke magazine with Sabin Muzaffar

2018-01-05

Sabin Muzaffar is the Executive Editor & Founder of Ananke (www.anankemag.com), a digital platform empowering women through advocacy, awareness and education. Sabin has two decades of experience in traditional and new media – starting her professional journey in Karachi, Pakistan. She has worked for and contributed to numerous local & international publications including daily The News International, SPIDER, SHE, Dawn, Gulf News, Khaleej Times, ITP publication, BBVA OPENMIND, International Women’s Initiative and many more.

A collaborator and speaker at many events, Sabin was selected as UN Women’s Empower Global Champion for Women’s Economic Empowerment 2915-2016 and is currently an Empower Women Mentor and partner; in addition to being a Vision Mentor at World Pulse.

In 2014, acknowledging the gaping void in the digital realm in terms of documenting women’s achievements and highlighting HERstories, Sabin founded Ananke magazine. The platform not only covers in-depth articles on topics like women’s health, education, STEM, Law, climate change with a gender perspective; it showcases women as role models for young aspiring women. In 2016, Ananke launched its digital internship program for girls that enables anyone to apply from anywhere in the world. Over 30 girls from countries including Pakistan, Australia, the UAE, US, Kenya, Ghana, Nigeria and Turkey have been mentored over the past 11 months.

Sabin‘s vision is provide a platform for dialogue on Women’s Economic Empowerment and how women can empower other women through collaboration.

For listeners without an Apple product with the “podcast” app, please visit: https://soundcloud.com/user-476654029/episode-005-sabin-muzaffar-unwomen-gender-equality-ananke-magazine-empowering-women to listen to the episode.

For listeners with an Apple product: https://itunes.apple.com/nl/podcast/pave-professionals-against/id1203285774?l=en is the way to go.

Topics discussed and organisations/events mentioned in this episode:

Ananke magazine – an interactive platform, that empowers women through education and awareness
Empower women – a UN entity
World Pulse
Women’s economic empowerment
How Ananke is perceived by the male population in Dubai and UAE’s vision about gender equality, inclusion and diversity.
Patriarchal societies.
The importance of collaboration

More about Sabin Muzaffar

Sabin’s twitter: https://twitter.com/critoe

Ananke’s twitter: https://twitter.com/anankemag

More about PAVE

Twitter.com/pave_podcast

PAVE 004: UNwomen, CSW and International Womens Day with Ravi Karkara

2017-12-29

Regarding Ravi Karkara’s investigation:

Update 09/08/2018

A while ago I was warned by Mandy Sanghera (my mentor and first guest on the PAVE podcast) that Ravi Karkara was under investigation for sexual misconduct.

Ravi was also one of the first guests of the PAVE podcast and senior advisor for UN women. Although I knew about this dreadful news for a while I am still shocked and at first didn’t know what to do about this particular episode with Ravi. Should I delete it, should I take it down, I really had no idea. And to be honest I am still not quite sure what to do with it right now.

Until I am sure about what to do I decided to keep this episode. Not only because the investigation is still going on but also because it shows that (sexual) abuse, manipulation and misuse of power can happen everywhere. That what someone is pretending to be can very differ from the reality. It can happen in every organisation, in every position, regardless of gender and even an institution like the UN is not immune to it.

What is important now is what the UN will do with their investigation and the other accusations in former and present complaints and very importantly: how the UN will reform it’s culture.

My wish is that the UN will take a stand and will serve as a rolemodel for institutions like courts, police stations and so on. Because victims have been silenced for to long.

#silencedtoolong. #metoo

https://www.theguardian.com/global-development/2018/aug/08/senior-un-gender-and-youth-adviser-accused-sexual-misconduct-ravi-karkara-investigation-eight-men-un-women

Ravi Karkara is a Senior Advisor on Strategic Partnerships and Advocacy to the Assistant Secretary General to the UN and Deputy Executive Director at UN Women. With over two decades of experience, Ravi is an expert in various international development-related fields, driving innovation, building strategic partnerships, and promoting advocacy and programming in the areas of human rights, gender equality, accountability and social justice. He is also the Acting Head of Private Sector for UN Women.

Ravi has been instrumental in supporting UN Women’s work on strategy development – this includes Strategy on Youth and Gender Equality, Working with Boys and Men in Gender Equality.

He has been awarded the Global Officials Award for his work on youth and gender equality and the Inter-Faith Award on promoting peace and harmony. He was also appointed as Junior Chamber International Ambassador. Previously, he has also worked with the UN Millennium Campaign, UN-HABITAT, UNICEF and Save the Children and has written more than 80 publications/articles in his career spanning over two decades.