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PAVE 012: Domestic abuse training & sexual violence training in every organisation with Lyndsey Dearlove from UK says NO MORE

Lyndsey Dearlove UK says no more

Lyndsey Dearlove has spent the past couple of years developing UK SAYS NO MORE – a national initiative to raise awareness of domestic abuse and sexual violence in the UK and Bright Sky – a domestic abuse and sexual violence awareness and prevention app for victims of abuse, professionals and for those who are concerned about a friend, colleague or family member. Prior to this Lyndsey has worked with victims of domestic abuse, sexual violence and violent crime for over 15 years.

She has managed domestic abuse outreach support services, refuges, children and family services, Independent domestic violence services (IDVA) and co-ordinated multi-agency risk assessment conferences (MARAC’s). During her time as the manager of the Hillingdon domestic abuse outreach service, she developed the award winning Butterfly Project which is an adaptable model for survivor led – peer support groups. Lyndsey has extensive experience in creating and delivering training around gender constructs, peer support, young people and abuse, risk assessment and management, domestic abuse and sexual violence.

She has delivered training to the Metropolitan police, Local authorities, not for profit organisations, universities and colleges and most recently the National Football League (NFL), where she created and delivered training around gender, domestic abuse and sexual violence. Lyndsey enjoys bringing people to together; to share experiences, ideas, knowledge and expertise and truly believes that only by working together can we end domestic abuse and sexual violence.

ABOUT HESTIA – Hestia delivers services across London and the surrounding regions, as well as campaign and advocate nationally on the issues that affect the people we work with. Last year they supported over 9,000 men, women and children. This includes victims of modern slavery, women and children who have experienced domestic abuse, young care leavers and older people. From giving someone a home, to helping them to get the right mental health support, they support people at the moment of crisis and enable them to build a life beyond a crisis. Hestia is supported by more than 460 volunteers across London who provide specialist skills such as art therapy, yoga, IT, gardening and cooking, as well as befriending and fundraising. Hestia is proud to be the home of UK SAYS NO MORE, bringing together a diverse coalition of individuals, charities, businesses and public sector organisations to campaign for an end to domestic abuse and sexual violence.

UK SAYS NO MORE is a national campaign launched to raise awareness of domestic violence and sexual assault across the UK. The campaign was launched by London charity Hestia in 2016. UK SAYS NO MORE seeks to unite and strengthen a diverse community of members of the public and organisations nationwide to actively take a stand against domestic violence and sexual assault under one powerful, visual symbol. The campaign provides open-source tools and resources for individuals and organisations to take action and get involved in ending domestic violence and sexual assault. Together we can challenge the myths and misconceptions around these issues, share resources and information, and ultimately work together to make real positive change.

To listen to the PAVE podcast Episode 012 with Lyndsey Dearlove please click here:

About your host: 

Alianne Looijenga is an international speaker motivating organizations to effectively help survivors of partner abuse, child abuse and sexual abuse. She is also the founder of aliannelooijenga.com and the Professionals against violence (PAVE) podcast.   Alianne is a survivor of sexual abuse (including rape); partner abuse; and is the mother of twins who were abused by their biological father after a judge granted him visitation rights when the children were three years old.

Alianne is dedicated to the empowerment of survivors of abuse and to support organisations working to end the violence against women and children.

Lyndsey Dearlove UK says no more

TOPICS DISCUSSED AND ORGANISATIONS/EVENTS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

0-19 minutes: About Hestia, UK says no more, Lyndsey Dearlove

20.00 NFL ambassadorprogram where football players teach other boys about what masculinity means in this society, concent in healthy relationships and what their role is to end the violence against women. 

“If I am unable to drive someone home in a car why are you able to decide if you are able to have consensual sex or not”

25:00 No more hub

26:00 UK says no more week

30:00 When Lyndsey is old and is looking back at her life, what does she want to have accomplished?

34:00 minuten Victim blaming Knowledge is nothing untill you share it “

“We have to have domestic abuse training and sexual violence training in every single organisation”

36:00 listening without judging

37:00 an exercise Lyndsey always does with her students to let them feel the reality survivors face when leaving an abuser. 

40:00 Managing UK says no more and working with surviving children

45:00 The importance of education 

49:00 How to leave your work at work

50:00 Taking time to reflect

51:00 With all things going on, what is Lyndsey most eager to solve

57:00 Advice inspiration and a succes story

 

TWEETABLES:

MORE ABOUT UK SAYS NO MORE

Our website is: http://uksaysnomore.org/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/UKSAYSNOMORE/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/UKSAYSNOMORE

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/uksaysnomore/?hl=en

MORE ABOUT PAVE

https://www.instagram.com/aliannelooijenga

www.aliannelooijenga.com

SPONSORS

If you want to be a guest on the PAVE podcast, a volunteer working for PAVE, if you are interested in becoming a PAVE sponsor, or want to help us in an other way, email me to see how we can work together to end the violence against women and children.

email: alianne@aliannelooijenga.com

To listen to the PAVE podcast Episode 012 with Lyndsey Dearlove from UK says NO MORE please click here:

Abuse, Activism, Gender Equality, PAVE Podcast, Podcast, Women's rights

PAVE 011: Fighting your own battles first before you can save others and become a superwoman next door with Upasana Chauhan

Upasana Chauhan

Upasana Chauhan is the founder of Superwoman Next Door. She is an UN Representative  of Manup Campaign, spread across 23 countries to involve men in the battle of Gender Equality. Upasana send me an impressive list of 14 organisations/projects she is involved with including many from the UN, but it would be a too long (although impressive) list to share on this blogpage. If you want to read it for yourself, click here: http://www.womenshealthsection.com/content/documents/Upasana_Chauhan_Resume.pdf

Upasana’s dream and passion is to encourage and empower every girl next door to be courageous to DARE TO DREAM and be her own superwoman to get those dreams. She is on the drafting committee for the Newyork City for CEDAW bill.

To listen to the PAVE podcast Episode 011 with Upasana Chauhan please click here: PAVE podcast with Upasana Chauhan on Itunes

About your host: 

Alianne Looijenga is an international speaker motivating organizations to effectively help survivors of partner abuse, child abuse and sexual abuse. She is also the founder of aliannelooijenga.com and the Professionals against violence (PAVE) podcast.   Alianne is a survivor of sexual abuse (including rape); partner abuse; and is the mother of twins who were abused by their biological father after a judge granted him visitation rights when the children were three years old.

Alianne is dedicated to the empowerment of survivors of abuse and to support organisations working to end the violence against women and children.

TOPICS DISCUSSED AND ORGANISATIONS/EVENTS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

1:24 : Growing up in India

2:50 Paving your own path and paving the path for others 

3:15 NGO “I do dare”, ManUp campaign of the UN, Upasana’s career so far. 

7:00 Is there a change within the men of India, about how they view women? 

7:30 How men teach other men about women’s rights

8:00 Losing your identity as a woman when you marry in India

10:00 What Upasana discovered when she was looking for an arranged marriage

12:00 Passing values on to your children

14:50 What drives Upasana

21:00 When women are objects and have no rights

24:00 How do you re-energize when you fight so hard for other women’s rights?

32:00 Why people believe that they are entitled to judge another human being

33:00 Rediscovering your identity

35:00 Female suicides in India 

I can do anything for them, but I can’t go to their homes with them. Because that is a battle that each one has to fight for themselves.

I had to fight the battle myself inside my own home first. Then only I can fight it globally. You have to first fight it for yourself.

40:00 The importance of financial independence

Take that fear out of your body. Throw the fear out. Fear controls you. You get scared what happens if I do this, or what happens if I do that.

44:00 Upasana’s advice if you want to change other people’s lives

46:00 Why your work should not be about you

48:00 When you respond with kindness and love to people who put you down, you include them into your journey

51:00 How we can support Upasana by sharing stories about women who live next door to us.

“Alianne is equally Oprah Winfrey as Oprah Winfrey is Alianne.

You are your own superwoman in your own way doing your own amazing thing. So is Oprah. The only difference is that the whole world knows Oprah, and your neighbor knows Alianne. But is Alianne any less than Oprah? No. And that’s why I started SuperWoman Next Door.” – Upasana Chauhan 

59:00 Initial ending: yeah kidding, we talked further

1:03:00 Get out of that thing that holds you down

Be your own superwoman. Don’t wait for someone to save you. Nobody will come and save you. You will have to save yourself. There is no prince charming. And even if there is, he can come and join you while you save yourself. But you don’t have to sit and wait around. You have to take control.

1:08:00 Being grateful in difficult times, ending. 

TWEETABLES:

MORE ABOUT UPASANA AND SUPERWOMAN NEXT DOOR

https://twitter.com/upasanac?lang=en

https://www.facebook.com/superwomannextdoor/

Superwoman Next Door website

To submit stories to Upasana:

superwomannextdoor@gmail.com

MORE ABOUT PAVE

https://www.instagram.com/aliannelooijenga

Www.aliannelooijenga.com

SPONSORS

If you want to be a guest on the PAVE podcast, a volunteer working for PAVE, if you are interested in becoming a PAVE sponsor, or want to help us in an other way, email me to see how we can work together to end the violence against women and children.

email: alianne@aliannelooijenga.com

To listen to the PAVE podcast Episode 011 with Upasana Chauhan please click here: PAVE podcast with Upasana Chauhan on Itunes

 

Abuse, Activism, Gender Equality, PAVE Podcast, Podcast, UN women, Women's rights